God is Punishing Me

 Omo!

In the past few weeks that this year has had, I have had several bad days. And at a point, it felt like my world was crashing. My bad days have spanned from not doing a proper job, to getting fake bills, to losing money, to laptop crashing few hours to submitting an assignment, to getting injured, to losing relationships, resources and opportunities, among many other bad things. In this year alone, I have cried so much that my head keeps spinning. In recent days, I even feel my chest tightening (I pray it's not something serious).

Furthermore, in these bad days, I have had to question myself. I have heard myself say "God is punishing me" maybe for not reading my Bible, or for not fasting, or for not spending enough time with Him or for one thing or the other. I have heard myself say "God is punishing me for a sin that is why I am having a bad day".

It has not been easy but I am grateful for the gift of friends and community that I currently have. They have helped me to see that God is not a dictator filled with wrath and or a God waiting for every opportunity to punish me and that is why I am sharing this.

Have you ever felt your world crashing?

Have you ever had reasons to question and ask if God is punishing you?

Have you ever felt grief, hurt, loss, loneliness or you feel that God is against you or something?

Then, this post is for you!

I want you to know that it is perfectly normal to feel that way.  And I'm sure Job also wondered if God was punishing him when his world came crashing down.

However, because it is normal to feel that way does not mean it's the truth or that it is right. God loves us so much and He is not out to get us. He is not waiting for us to misbehave so that He can inflict hardships on us. He is such a dotting father who loves so much than our brains or imaginations can fathom.

Whenever you feel that way, I want you to remember that it is not all about you. Bad things happen to good and bad people and believe me, "you are not that special" so bad things can happens to you too. It doesn't mean that God is punishing you.

Whenever you feel that way, I want you to talk to God. Pray and seek the face of God. Get real with God and listen to what He has to say about you. You can also read His words, His beautiful promises and love-words to you. This can reassure you and remind you of just how much you mean to Him. If you can, worship. (It does not matter how bad my world is, I feel better after worship and I think you would too). So, worship!

Don't get me wrong!

I'm not saying there aren't times that our choices are to be blamed, because there are. But I'm saying remember that God is loving. Don't be consumed with the idea that God is punishing you. Remember that He is a caring and sweet father who is not waiting for you to mess up so that He can inflict pain on you. He wants us to know and experience the infinite love that He has for us. Never forget that He loves you!

The truth is that we might never know why we are suffering or why bad things are happening to us. However, we can be sure that God can turn those bad things into good. We can be sure that God loves us so much and He is for us. We can be sure that God is not punishing us. God is not policing us to do wrong so that He can punish us. He loves us so much. When the hard times come, turn to Him, and there you would find love, strength and comfort.

1John 4 verse 18 says that His love has no fear because it's a perfect love that expels all fears. If we are afraid, it's for fear of punishment and this only shows that we haven't experienced His perfect love. Nothing you do can make God love you less. He died for you while you were yet a sinner. He loves you. Never forget that!

Thank you so much for reading. You can drop your thoughts, comments and opinions in the comment section. I would love to hear from you.

#hephzibahsdiary
#lightbearer
#Godsdelight

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